christmas rush

oops. i'm gonna be late this year. placed my order 60 minutes past the deadline and that's setting my delivery back 3-5 days. oh well...i think they'll still appreciate it, it's a personalized item.

kicked off my winter break with a party at our house. it was hectic preparing for it, but it all worked out just before people began arriving. it was a fun nite. my husband mixed some lethal drinks...knocked me and my friends out! our theme was mele kalikimaka! since several of our friends made it back home for our wedding and became drawn to some of our cuisine...i thought we better host a hawaii nite. SO, appetizers: teriyaki sticks and spam won tons. main dish: loco mocos. dessert: haupia shortbread bars. drinks: tropical itch. entertainment: jonelle and chucky's engagement and wedding slideshows AND white elephant exchanges. a fun nite with fun peeps.

thanksgiving

all the slicing's been done. turkey's soaking in the brine. lord of the rings is playing. the dough for the rolls is rising. my bundle of wheat and bronze turkey candle holders are on the table. the crisp air blows through the open windows and freshens the house. thanksgiving's here once again. and, i have much to be thankful for: a loving, committed husband. a happy, healthy little girl. a new, fun-loving little boy. and of course, my ever-so-loyal dog. who's laying at my feet, keeping near as always. my life is so full having them surround me every day. i am grateful for the family that i grew up with. i appreciate the friendships i've made along the way. i am fortunate to work for a boss who approaches education and management the way he does. and, i am thankful for all the blessings that's been bestowed upon me when things were not in my control. i am most certainly a lucky woman. so happy thanksgiving, we have much to oblige today...before jumping the gun like my neighbors and putting out your christmas lights and decorations!

upswing

i love the upswing. when things were spiraling out of order and are now falling back into place. my zen is returning just in time for the holidays and i am thankful for that. no need to watch my kung fu mantras...i've gotten centered without it. ohmmmm. (imagine the buddah-esque pose)

alignment

in certain things, all is right with the world again. (massive sigh) what a test of endurance and resolve. so now that things are on track, i commence with my preparation for familial celebrations of the holidays. now i can look forward to them instead of feeling disappointed and unmotivated. i will be surrounded by the 3 that i wanted around me on christmas and that, is priceless. how did i switch the gear? today was the first step. thanksgiving shopping. christmas photos with santa clothes shopping. researching santa's schedule at north park. dragging cody and chucky to find just the right lighted deer for our front yard. (big smile) it's official. as it should be, i'm excited for the holidays again.

wedded bliss

a few photos from a moment i didn't think would come for me, proving that there IS life after perceived death...you just gotta hang in there.

spaceships and barbies

it always makes me smile when i hear the two mini-mes integrate their toys into play together. cody is apparently protecting taylor's barbie. so far "the beast" (kai) has not tried to engage in play as she has been encouraged to do in the past.

world domination

the children (students and my own) are taking over. i would like just 15 minutes of no one calling my name or needing directions repeated. yeah...that's heaven right there. how pathetic am i??? the mister needs to give me a foot massage upon coming home tonight.

deja vu

it's been about 3 years since i felt this way. i didn't think i was ever going to feel this way again. i guess that was pretty naive of me. i want the tears to burst but they're not ready. i don't know why they wouldn't be ready...i feel low enough. kai-doggie senses the rock bottom. and like 3 years ago, she's cuddled up next to me. how comforting constant is...especially from the same presence.

stupid is as stupid does

the most frustrating thing is having to endure an ordeal because of one's lack of care. it doesn't take much to ask a clarifying question, but to put forth the effort...now that is the hurdle some face. it starts with one little misinterpretation, and then the next thing you know...it snowballs into this huge thing. emotions run high, resentment settles in, immature actions take place and viola...you've got a massive conflict. it usually takes quite a bit of time and energy to peel back the layers of all that has happened. and then you get to the middle, the thing that started it all. and then you find out it was something that could have been cleared up with a simple question or a reread of an email way back when. after the discovery and clarification, you don't know whether to feel relieved it wasn't a larger issue or extend your hands to beat the person because it was something so minor. in the end, communication is two-sided and no matter the care you take into conveying what you mean, it is completely up to the other person to construct their meaning from the information you gave them...with either the same amount of care or very little. you know, forest's mama was pretty wise. only, i wonder sometimes, if maybe i could get a different box of chocolates.

in the hole

sometimes we have to dig deep to make it through. i don't think it's too bad if it's a one-time event. but sustained digging deep? that's a different story. especially when it involves people. people whose roles have changed in your life, but they still linger because they have to. sometimes i, like many, wish that i could 86 "have to". but then, i guess i wouldn't have situations in which i needed to dig deep and learn what i am supposed to. ok, i change my wish then. i wish other people could dig deep when it involves me. dig deep to do the right thing. be moral & have integrity when they don't want to. cause...i'm tired of doing all the *blasted* digging.

inspired

got my new name. after firing some dendrites for about 40 minutes, my bloggy-blog's moved to a different addy (thank god for google and the user-friendliness of blogger). this brings me joy. it frees me. to begin expressing myself once more. 'cause i've fallen a big fall, but now i'm up. ready to dust off the keyboard for real this time. i need to find my voice once more, for me.

token post

so i get an email from google saying to log into my blog using my gmail addy. i know this, but i'm thinking they're indirectly checking to see if i'm still alive? wow. i'm so touched that google cares. so in fear of getting my blog booted, i thought i better say SOMETHING...even as insignificant as this. i gotta feeling...though...that after the wedding it'll be more frequent :)